In His hands.
"And when night comes, and you look back over the day and see how fragmentary everything has been, and how much you planned that has gone undone, and all the reasons who have to be embarrassed and ashamed: just take everything exactly as it is, put it in God's hands and leave it with Him."
-Edith Stein
Grasping for air is all I ever do. I see the Lord's face only in slivers of the day. In the glaze and shine of a shop window as I pass through the roughest part of town. In the eyes of my tired, weary, and overworked Father. In the messiness of our family kitchen as my mom's hands do a dance with the chili peppers she is sprinkling onto something lethal.
Jesus' eyes appear in the lids of mine when I take the moment to close them and think of Him. And in this world of messiness and chaos, I struggle to take that breath, or is it a sigh? A sigh that releases the pang of me not being with my Jesus every hour of the day. The absence consumes my soul and halts my mind. That is why my mind races and searches for the closest moment to be able to take a deep cooling breath that can release him back into the caverns of my soul.
The way I serve people this summer is allowing me to clear my mind and work my hands to tiredness for the needs of others. It may be the job I have known for years but to find a new way to hear the smallest needs of people is so important to the heart of my Jesus.
This summer is going on like a scratched record on a turn table. It's struggling to play fluidly with sharp twists and turns that screech in your ear and numbs your mind. It's work, eat, sleep and work, eat, sleep, and HALT. Who died? Why? How? When? And suddenly my day to day becomes a little more silent. The record is trying to play itself again but its just sitting there with the needle hovering over and trying to reach the record to play again. But until I take the time to let Holy Spirit guide me in that repair, it cannot continue playing.
Those struggles I face day to day of the repetitive and numbing motions of my day to day human life can rest easy in the arms of Christ. They are getting in my way of seeing the true face of Jesus in the people I encounter. Allowing Christ to take those small tasks on will help me reach Him sooner and accept his graces more willingly and openly and I am so eager and joyful to finally hear and see my Jesus.
Jesus' eyes appear in the lids of mine when I take the moment to close them and think of Him. And in this world of messiness and chaos, I struggle to take that breath, or is it a sigh? A sigh that releases the pang of me not being with my Jesus every hour of the day. The absence consumes my soul and halts my mind. That is why my mind races and searches for the closest moment to be able to take a deep cooling breath that can release him back into the caverns of my soul.
The way I serve people this summer is allowing me to clear my mind and work my hands to tiredness for the needs of others. It may be the job I have known for years but to find a new way to hear the smallest needs of people is so important to the heart of my Jesus.
This summer is going on like a scratched record on a turn table. It's struggling to play fluidly with sharp twists and turns that screech in your ear and numbs your mind. It's work, eat, sleep and work, eat, sleep, and HALT. Who died? Why? How? When? And suddenly my day to day becomes a little more silent. The record is trying to play itself again but its just sitting there with the needle hovering over and trying to reach the record to play again. But until I take the time to let Holy Spirit guide me in that repair, it cannot continue playing.
Those struggles I face day to day of the repetitive and numbing motions of my day to day human life can rest easy in the arms of Christ. They are getting in my way of seeing the true face of Jesus in the people I encounter. Allowing Christ to take those small tasks on will help me reach Him sooner and accept his graces more willingly and openly and I am so eager and joyful to finally hear and see my Jesus.
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