And the summer kept going...
Wow. So that summer didn't go like I was expecting it to. As I have missed many Friday blog posts, you might guess that life got crazy. And crazy is fine, that's how life should get. Just crazy. We're all just crazy kids holding onto crazy dreams, crazy old friends, meeting even crazier new ones making crazy memories we will forever hold on to.
This crazy summer started off slow in the hot streets of LA. But it ran me flat on my back and I couldn't seem to make it up for air. Being at my home parish felt off. I halfway expected it, but I knew that my days helping out with youth ministry is what kept me always there and since I've been away at school it has felt like somewhat of a past life. And just as the heat started to consume us and slow us down, so did the worst possible news. One of our graduated teens took his life. His name was James.
It's not something to comprehend really. In this ministry you get so attached. These teen's souls are reaching through their chest just trying to grasp some sort of reality in their crazy world and you just try your best to show them that Christ is willing to claim their hearts. Facing his parents and his sisters was the hardest thing. What I felt? Well, my jaw felt heavy, my eyes grew tired to hold open, my mind was muddled. Prior to his funeral, I had to go to a distant family member's funeral. That week felt like one long day, like a summer solstice day where the heat is just beating down on you, not giving you a break. There's no shade and no sunset in sight. You just have to sit there as it passes and try not to let the heat drive you mad.
But just like that, life didn't stop. I tried to make sense of things in between blinks, but I couldn't. Plans started to fall through, people didn't text back, work started to keep me busy, and the summer kept going. It felt like it was never going to stop. Now that I am back at school, I know I can at least try to recuperate. So far starting school has been a lot of "So, how was your summer?" I feel a jolt in my jaw and a faster beat in my chest, I hold my breath and simply reply, "Okay".
Jesus is healing me. Through his gaze and constant direction, I will soon actually be "okay"and I just can't wait to get there.
This crazy summer started off slow in the hot streets of LA. But it ran me flat on my back and I couldn't seem to make it up for air. Being at my home parish felt off. I halfway expected it, but I knew that my days helping out with youth ministry is what kept me always there and since I've been away at school it has felt like somewhat of a past life. And just as the heat started to consume us and slow us down, so did the worst possible news. One of our graduated teens took his life. His name was James.
It's not something to comprehend really. In this ministry you get so attached. These teen's souls are reaching through their chest just trying to grasp some sort of reality in their crazy world and you just try your best to show them that Christ is willing to claim their hearts. Facing his parents and his sisters was the hardest thing. What I felt? Well, my jaw felt heavy, my eyes grew tired to hold open, my mind was muddled. Prior to his funeral, I had to go to a distant family member's funeral. That week felt like one long day, like a summer solstice day where the heat is just beating down on you, not giving you a break. There's no shade and no sunset in sight. You just have to sit there as it passes and try not to let the heat drive you mad.
But just like that, life didn't stop. I tried to make sense of things in between blinks, but I couldn't. Plans started to fall through, people didn't text back, work started to keep me busy, and the summer kept going. It felt like it was never going to stop. Now that I am back at school, I know I can at least try to recuperate. So far starting school has been a lot of "So, how was your summer?" I feel a jolt in my jaw and a faster beat in my chest, I hold my breath and simply reply, "Okay".
Jesus is healing me. Through his gaze and constant direction, I will soon actually be "okay"and I just can't wait to get there.


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